Adverbs Die Slowly

Today’s Writing 101 challenge – to describe a public place, to make it come alive without using any adverbs…

The wooden decking of The Ancient Mariner Inn was infected with the dullness of the day. Grey waves struggled to break on the distant beach. Grey clouds were too lazy to move from their comfortable position over this end of season seaside town. These were spiteful clouds, threatening rain but, in a display of power, refusing to break the tension.

waves under dark sky in black and white

The family at the next table discussed the contestants on X Factor as they waited for their food. The older man dominated the conversation, his presence spreading across the table like a spilt glass of beer.

I put my notebook aside when the fish and chips arrived. Comfort food, and I make no apologies for that. A few more people had arrived and were busy choosing where to sit and what to order at the bar. Greyness attracts greyness. I needed the yellow chips to short-circuit the monotony.

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2 thoughts on “Adverbs Die Slowly

  1. Good job, Nice descriptions. I found this little adverb detector and copied your text into it and it found 4: “on” in “the waves breaking on the beach…”, “too” with “lazy”, “on” again in “the contestants on X-factor”, and finally “more” in “A few more people had arrived…”. Hope you don’t mind. It was for my own personal curiosity and I wouldn’t have known they were that’s for sure…lol. Be interesting to know if a human expert would have come to the same analysis. 🙂 (I have no affiliation to this but if you’re interested… http://www.cthreepo.com/writing/adverb-detector/

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