This is the first post in a WP challenge (“Bloganuary”) to write something every day throughout January with the aid of a prompt. The above title is the prompt.
As is the case for most people, my teenage years occupied 7 years of my life. They began shortly before the FIFA World Cup in 1966 and ended in a strange haze on the beach at Matala in Crete. Between times, there was of course much social and political change across the world. The Vietnam war in particular cast a long shadow over those years, even though my life in Croydon was not obviously touched by the tragedy. But I remember being upset by the Aberfan disaster in the October of my first teenage year.
That is the wider historical context of my teenage years. It was also of course the era of free love, but I think I must have been in the wrong queue for that. I worked hard for my GCEs (as they were then – General Certificates of Education) and my A-levels. I was fortunate enough to go to a school that did GCEs rather than the less academic CSEs (Certificates of Secondary Education).
I suppose my first piece of advice to myself would be to study harder. I did reasonably well, but it could have been better. I was good at procrastinating, and that is a skill that has stayed with me for many years (and has probably caused me no end of problems in the work place).
There were experiences and opportunities that I missed out on. This may partly be due to not recognising them as such at the time, but I think mostly because of fearfulness and lack of self-confidence. I would advise my teenage self to be more attuned to what life is offering, and to have the confidence to take those opportunities. What could be the worst that could happen? And if the worst happened, how would you cope? Obviously, I would be going back as a very competent cognitive behavioural therapist, so something worked out OK in the end. One opportunity I missed out on was the gift of hindsight – if only I had known!
The teenage years are renowned for their turbulence. While on the one hand I was shy, socially awkward and lacking in confidence, there were times when I was unbearably arrogant, selfish and insensitive to the feelings of others. Further advice to my younger self – take time to think about how your behaviour is impacting on others. You are not the centre of the universe, you are at best an annoying little asteroid or speck of space dust. (Oh, we don’t want to condemn this poor formative soul – you have the potential to become a star. Well, at least to have a starring role in your own life).
My final advice? This is a difficult one. I run the risk of falling into cliches and platitudes. Was there ever a teenager who heeded advice? Maybe just that everything will make sense in the end. Nothing is wasted – in time, everything finds it’s relevance. Perhaps more of a hope than advice, but it is the best I can do for now.
The Frothy Filosofer 